Dead Muses
by StOnE CoLd SaRaH
Summary: Title pretty much says it all. Just some fluff stuff until my muses return from vacation. Minor slash warning.


A/N: I wrote this awhile ago (as in pre-Test having fans). After talking to Tom, and Kitten... bad thoughts come to my mind about my muses... *dum* *dum* I own none of these wrestlers, and I'm sorry for the whole fact that I'm more or less killing them off. Bad muses, bad. A lot of this is morbid. The rest is just humor. Review please, flames will be read and then laughed at. Rock on!   
  
  
  
My depressed Raven muse: ended up hanging himself and cutting his wrists, when he found out my Molly muse was going out with my Christian muse. His last words were, "I can deal with Hurricane. I can kinda understand Spike. But, Christian?!?!?!" He died in his Christ-pose.  
  
  
Gangrel muse: Started coughing up blood ^__^  
  
  
Edge muse: After Christian muse punched him in the mouth during one their fights, he choked on his dentures (how else do you explain those teeth of his?!?!) and died.   
  
Then, he rose up from his coffin, because he's a vampire and all. Sadly, my Buffy muse was standing over Edge muse's grave and staked him.  
  
  
Buffy muse: I killed her off, after she killled the Edge muse.  
  
  
Christian muse: hits his head on a sharp thumbtack (left over from my Hardcore Foley muse) during one of his temper tantruems.   
  
  
Jerky Jericho muse: dies when he figured out he was allegic to Stephanie muses 'special lotion.' Massive hives insued and he died rather painfully.   
  
  
Jerky Jericho muse #2: Lucky the Dog comes back from the vet *evil music* with RABIES! *dum* *dum* *dum*  
  
  
'Pure' Molly Holly muse: Dies when attempting to dye her hair an even darker color, forgets to do this in a circulated room. She ends up dying from the fumes.   
  
  
Jeff Hardy muse: Died when he popped a skittle into his mouth and started jumping around, and the skittle ended up going down the wrong tube, and he ended up choking to his death.  
  
  
Hurricane Helms muse: Attempts to fly and falls off a 50 foot building (Ah, you saw that one coming....)  
  
  
Nidia muse: Ends up catching VD from Jamie Noble ^___^  
  
  
Stacy Kiebler: Ends up bleeding to death after nicking the back of her legs while shaving.   
  
  
Mick Foley muse: dies from a papercut after writing his 50th best selling New York Times book, RIGHT HERE IN THIS VERY CITY! *cheap pop*  
  
  
Billy Kidman muse: Dies after fighting for Torrie muses honor aganist Tajiri muse (Don't worry, this is *not* the ending to my Billy/Torrie story)  
  
  
Sadist Raven muse #1: Bondage night with Steven Richards muse goes horribly wrong.   
  
  
Sadist Raven muse #2: Bondage night with Tommy Dreamer muse goes horribly wrong.   
  
  
Sadist Raven muse #3: Bondage night with Jeff Hardy muse goes horribly wrong.   
  
  
Sadist Raven muse #4: Bondage night with Rob Van Dam muse goes horribly wrong.   
  
  
Rob Van Dam muse: ends up stretching the wrong way and killing himself.  
  
  
Spike muse: While working out with Trish muse, he gets to close to her massive breasts and is crushed to death (Sorry VF!!)  
  
  
Trish muse: Is killed when Molly Holly fans run her over with *their* behinds in memory of Molly.  
  
  
Lance Storm muse: Dies when he is accidentally impaled on a Canadian flag. (Hey, it's the only way he would -WANT- to die...)  
  
  
Goldust muse: In an attempt to make himself entirly gold... he encases himself in a gold paint and slowly dies as it drys (He forgot to make nose holes, silly Goldy!)  
  
  
Tommy Dreamer muse: eats something that really doesn't agree with him (AKA: the fender part of a car) and gets very sick and dies.  
  
  
Tazz muse: Oompa Lumpa's invade Smackdown while he's broadcasting and *literally* choke him out... with candy!   
  
  
Perry Saturn and Al Snow muses: Head muse (wait.. can Head be a muse? I guess so...) is found with Moppy (muse?) in a broom closet, and Perry muse and Al muse commit double suicide  
  
  
Test muse: Realizes that StOnE CoLd SaRaH is the only chick that really digs him, and he commits suicide. (I have such a high opinion of myself...)   
  
  
Hardcore Bob muse: Is killed by me, and DDP muse. Cuz Hardcore Bob muse is the reason that DDP and DDP muse had to retire. *waves to Kitten*  
  
  
Kanyon muse: His Mortis character becomes a cult hit, and he realizes how depressing it is that people found that character cooler then him, and he kills himself... (And I'm sure having Depressed WCW Raven muse whispering stuff into his ear didn't help any...)  
  
  
Justin Credible muse: Realizes he's going to be a sidekick for the rest of his life sucks, and kills himself (Poor Justin muse)   
  
  
X-Pac muse: Realizes he's going to be a sidekick for the rest of his life sucks, and kills himself by telling Rikishi to 'suck it' ...and 'Kishi does... *shudders*  
  
  
Kane muse: dies when his evil brother Undertaker muse throws him into a hotel bathtub, face first, and Kane drowns cuz he can't swim! (didn't see that one coming, huh?)   
  
  
Kane muse: Also, dies when he chokes on his rubber duckie in the bathtub... NOT LIKE THAT!!! O_O   
  
  
Terri muse: Wastes away to nothin---- Hey... wait a minute....  
  
  
Rhyno muse: My Smoochy Dreamer Jericho muse (Yes, I have one. And *only* one!) gets jealous at all the Rhyno/Stephanie moments and makes Rhyno GORE himself into a brick wall. Rhyno muse is not very smart.  
  
  
HHH muse: Gets depressed that he can't join in on all the fun of Billy/Chuck/Rico action. He commits suicide by smacking himself repeatly with the sledgehammer.   
  
  
Jericho/Moongoose McQueen muse: Kills himself after being forced to listen to an entire Britney Spears album.   
  
  
Edge muse: Is killed when he started humming a Britney Spears song to Jericho muse (Read Mick Foleys book!! Edge and Mick *really* went to one of her concerts! Mick scared her! She's a wimp!)  
  
  
APA muses: Die when forced to go to AA.   
  
  
Tazz muse #2: Goes to a Yankee game in his Mets stuff. He is promptly killed by the loud, drunken, and abrash Yankee fans. ^___^ (-Author waves her Yankee flag around while singing Irish drinking songs-)  
  
  
Brock muse dies when Goldburg muse takes him out from behind with his giant Chanukah menorah (Those things hurt!)  
  
  
Slashy Kurt muse: Dies from all the pressure of 'performing' with Slashy Benoit muse, yet not getting any because everyone knows Slashy Benoit is going out with Slashy Jericho muse! (Did you understand that? You did!? Then you're just as screwed up as me! Congrats!)  
  
  
Slashy Jericho muse: Kills himself when he finds Slashy Benoit muse (well, formally Slashy) and Stephanie muse in bed together  
  
  
Rico muse: On his first day on RAW, Rico muse saw Jeff Hardy Muses hair and had a heart attack and died.   
  
  
Shannon Moore muse: Realized that now that Shane muse jumped to RAW, 3 Count will never live again. He cried, and then was beaten up by my Backstreet Boy muses (Yes. I have some...) When Shane Helms heard of what those evil Backstreet Boy muses did to his ex-lover Shannon muse.... He went crazy and had Kane muse kill them all. Mwahhaa. Kane muse used fire. Fire burns!   
  
  
Micheal Cole muse: Uses that hair color for men that he and WWE is always shilling, and waits patiently for the women who are supposed to come and lick his hair to come. The only one who comes is Pat Patterson. Cole dies from heart attack.  
  
  
The End (-scary music-) FOR NOW! MWHAHAHAH! 


End file.
